Messages of wisdom from the Paper Crane Planner

2. Don't underestimate the importance of your event planner

I just came back from my cousin's beautiful wedding in sunny Florida. Despite having to use an event planner that was a part of her new family to not offend her, she probably would have rather had a wedding planner who was more in sync with her vision and style. This caused great friction in the decision making process and disconnect with the final outcome and her requests since the planner wanted to do one thing and my cousin had in mind something completely different. Luckily we were all there to help her and she was strong enough to put her foot down on things that mattered to her, but certain things, like her bouquet, which she specifically requested to be a certain way came out completely different. Fortunately it all came out beautiful anyway and the celebration of the marriage went off without any major hitches. It was truly an amazing day for a wedding on the beach and the important thing is that everyone had a great time celebrating their wedding day.

My cousin the beautiful bride and I toasting to her marriage on the limo ride to their ceremony on the beach.

Congratulations to the new Mr. and Mrs. Roache and family!

Lessons to be learned:

A) Make sure you have a solid contract! Don't think that things will naturally be done by your wedding planner. Ex. If you expect her to set up and tear down the wedding ceremony sites and the reception hall you should clearly specify it in your contract.

B) Meet with your wedding planner well before any preparations are made to make sure you are on the same page. You don't want her to start planning how your flowers are going to look without you getting to tell her what you had in mind and then it may be too late to order the flowers you really wanted, etc.

C) Ask to see samples of any work the planner is doing on her own. Ex. If she is making your bouquet, see if she can show you examples of her work or at least provide her with pictures of what you want so there is no confusion. Your idea of classy and understated could be completely different from hers!

D) Remember, the bride comes first! If she is not seeing things the way you are, ask to meet with her and figure out where you are not communicating your desires and make sure she realizes this is your day, so if you want something she doesn't agree with you still get what you want. She has more experience than you with planning events so hear out her advice, but in the end, you and your fiance should make all the calls because this is your big day.

E) If things don't go exactly according to plan, relax and enjoy the moment. You only get married once and the little things you think went wrong won't matter in the long run. No one will remember the bubbles that weren't passed out for your exit or the wedding programs that got left at the back of the church and no one got to see (the later happened at my wedding and I still have all the programs). What matters most is you and your fiance's commitment to each other and the joining of two families on this blessed occasion.

So pick your planner wisely and try to enjoy the occasion with your fiance, family, and friends. Everything will come together and as long as you have fun, everything else is just icing on the cake!

My gorgeous and delicious wedding cake by Torrance Bakery.